Ringing in the New Year

Well, 2016 sucked!

It was the worst year that I can remember for lots of reasons not worth gushing about because it's over ... thankfully.

Because 2016 sucked so bad, I'm so grateful for the support I received from my family over the past year.  My beautiful wife and continual supporter; my inspiring and loving kids; and my extended family for their love, guidance and support.

I learned a lot about humility in 2016, and I hope that will serve me well in the coming year.

So what's ahead for my family and me in 2017 to get excited and be optimistic about?

Oh, a few small things (tongue firmly in cheek) ...

• Me making a 'career pivot' and diversifying professionally beyond just being an HR guy.
• Holly dipping her toes back into the working world, continuing her role as SuperMom in the family.
• Haley becoming increasingly grown up and finding her way as a college student; finding the college major and career she wants to pursue.
• Alex closing out his high school days, deciding where he will go to college and venturing out as a young adult to bigger and better things.
• Luke growing out of those awkward teenage years and thriving in high school as an upperclassman; recognizing that he will have three bedrooms to choose from since he'll be the only one of our kids "stuck" living with Mom and Dad.
• Our family contemplating whether to remain in Denver, move back to Iowa, or split the difference and move back to Kansas City.
• All of our kids continuing to 'make us proud'.

I'm optimistic and hopeful that we'll make the right choices with these life decisions and 2017 will be much improved from 2016 for us.  It's going to be, it has to be.

Wishing you and yours the very best in 2017!  

Thanksgiving

No doubt, Thanksgiving was the holiday that we spent with Dad's side of the family.  I don't know exactly how much we saw our cousins on that side of our family, because my memory may just be skewed by the massive amount of time that we spent with our cousins on Mom's side.  But either way, it's interesting that it didn't seem to matter how much we saw the Franks - there wasn't anything awkward about it when we did get together.  We behaved as if we spend every day together!

I remember the "hunts" that we used to do, and what I remember most is the year that we actually killed a rabbit.  Of course it was dumb luck, because even though we had the sharpened sticks and other weapons, somebody (I think it was either Ed or Marty) stunned the rabbit by chucking a bottle at it.  Once it was stunned, we all swarmed like sharks with blood in the water.  It was dead within seconds.  I remember that although we were pretty proud of our work, Grandpa didn't seem to thrilled about cleaning a rabbit.  It wouldn't surprise me if he never did and that thing went right in the garbage.

On to the controversial topic of... apple pie.  I never really liked Grandma's apple pie, but that may be because I didn't really like apple pie at all as a kid.  Grandma was usually kind enough to make a chocolate pudding pie for me.  Please don't excommunicate me from the family, but even when I became an adult and started eating apple pie, I wasn't crazy about Grandma's version of it.  Maybe it was the texture.  Her apple pie was very mushy, and even to this day I like chunky apple pie.  Sorry Grandma, but I wouldn't worry about it.  I think I'm alone in the "not the best apple pie" camp.

Food...  I think the idea of eating loads of food is a purely adult take on Thanksgiving.  When I was a kid I don't think I was that crazy about Thanksgiving food.  It was food that you just don't typically eat.  Mashed potatoes?  Couldn't stand them as a kid.  Turkey?  Can I have a drumstick?  Casserole?  I never liked casserole as a kid, especially something like green bean casserole.  Pumpkin pie?  Ewww!  I'm not doubting that there was a TON of food at Thanksgiving, but for me, that wasn't really the draw.  I think my best hope was for an unattended dish of M&Ms or something like that.

I do like Thanksgiving, because it still is considered a holiday that you are supposed to spend with extended family.  That's the focus.  Christmas, due to the complications with Santa Claus delivering presents and the perceived obligation of family gift exchanges, etc., is a time when many people want to "hunker down" with their own individual family unit.  It's just less complicated than trying to get together with other family.

In fact, we should just get rid of Christmas altogether, huh Brad?  ;-)

Thanksgiving Memories

I recently came across a blog post I wrote but never published about Christmas memories.  I caught myself grinning fondly as the memories I wrote about sprung back to life for me.  What awesome memories!  Well, the same is true of Thanksgiving and since it's too early for a Christmas post (right Brad?) I thought I would jot down my memories of Thanksgiving growing up.

Not sure if my brothers will remember Thanksgiving as I did, but Thanksgiving was the holiday we generally spent with Dad's side of the family.  We weren't as close to Dad's side of the family for a number of reasons, but one reason was that our cousins on Dad's side were older, and there were more girls - so we didn't relate to them as closely as we did with the cousins on Mom's side of the family.  We were all pretty close in age, and mostly boys, so we had a lot in common.

Most Thanksgivings were spent at Grandma's, a mere four to six blocks away from our house.  I can remember Thanksgivings at Mary's or Marcie's, but not many.  Most were at Grandma's house, and the ones that were most memorable was when our cousins from Bellevue (near Dubuque) came ... the Franks.  Marty, Angie and Tony in that birth order with Marty being about my age and Tony being somewhere between Marc and Brad in age.  Angie usually tried to stay out of the way of five energetic boys trapped in a little house, looking for things to throw, shoot and tear up.

Following a traditional Thanksgiving meal, dessert was the real treat I remember about eating at Grandma's house.  Aside from Grandma's pickled beets, which for some reason I really liked and like to have on Thanksgiving in remembrance, Grandma's real treat was her apple pie.  Quite simply, it was the best ... and I can recall several debates with others as an adult because EVERYONE says their Grandma made the best pie.  But seriously, ours did!  As ammunition for why our Grandma's was the best I would usually ask, did your Grandma use real lard, real sugar, real apples, and make her crust from scratch?  If the answer to any of these questions was either 'I don't know' or 'no' then I had won the argument.  The Amish couldn't make a pie as good as Grandma.

While she made all sorts, pecan, cherry, rhubarb, peach and apple, none compared to the apple.  Boy, I wish I could have a piece right now!

Once someone filled your plate with turkey, ham, mash potatoes and gravy, and a carrot or slice of green pepper as garnish you headed to a card table in the back room of Grandma's house.  Away from adults in the kitchen that was engulfed with a standard dining room table and a mixed set of chairs to accommodate the large number of guests that were atypical for every day of the year except this one.

We chatted with cousins we saw once or twice a year, munched on the massive amount of food that none of us could finish, and gazed outside for some fresh air and room to breathe.  It didn't take long till the tipping point had been reached where we weren't going to eat any more (in spite of parent promptings) and the adults wanted us outside so they could enjoy the meal together in the absence of kids.  That's when the fun began!

It usually started innocent enough with throwing a football, a baseball or any object that could be made airborne behind the strength of a kid's arm.  All it took was one overthrow of the ball into any of the bushes that framed the back yard.  When that occurred and someone went into those bushes to retrieve the ball, out popped a rabbit who considered it little more than a distraction on a gorgeous fall day.  There were rabbits everywhere around Grandma's house ... it was on the outskirts of town and there was lots of cover and food for a ballooning rabbit population.

What it signaled for a bunch of boys was an opportunity to go hunting, rabbit hunting!

Our hunting instincts evolved quickly, first we would hurl the balls we had at the fleeing rabbits. From there it was sticks and rocks.  After that, spears (sticks with sharpened ends thanks to Grandpa's woodworking tools) and clubs that had nails affixed to them via electrical or duck tape, again thanks to Grandpa's stash in their garage.

Hours spent strategizing, stalking, chasing and hunting rabbits.  I remember coming back to Grandma's house with my arm sore, my body covered in sweat, my clothes covered in dirt and stickies (I don't remember the actual term) from the bushes we trounced through, and with a huge smile on my face because of the time spent with family. I was exhausted and incredibly happy.  And then I got to look forward to a slice of Grandma's apple pie, a side of vanilla ice cream, and a glass of milk.

I can also remember there being football on the TV, but I don't remember ever spending much time watching it. There was nothing like the fresh air, the leaves covering the green grass, the exercise from hunting rabbits, and topping it all off with a slice of Grandma's fresh apple pie with my cousins and brothers that was what made Thanksgiving special for me.

Ahhh, the good ole days!

P.S.  Marc, if you've got any pictures from Thanksgiving you could share to accompany this post that would be awesome.

Lies lies lies (no, not Fox news)!

I love the three lies and three truths.  In my own spiritual walk I find that one of the hardest things to do, and one of the things that our pastor is always reminding us to do, is to believe what GOD says about who I am, not what the world says about who I am.  God's truth is real truth, and God's love is not dependent on anything that we say or do, which is a lot different than what most of us experience on the human side of love.

I'm glad that you had a good retreat.  I haven't been to a "men's event" for a long time, and your blog makes me want to participate in something like that again.

My Disney observations

Your observations on Disney reminded me of a few of my own, and how much I love Disney.

They work unbelievably hard to maintain the magic at Disney.  You'll notice that it's nearly impossible to actually see anything broken, worn down, or trashy.  The place is spotless.  The upkeep is impeccable.  Even keeping the place clean is carefully orchestrated so as not to affect the magical sense of the park.  You don't see, for example, a cart full of trash bags - that all happens underground.  You don't see employees entering and exiting the park - they enter at a separate location out of the public eye.  I remember when I went to Disneyworld with the OCHS band my sophomore year.  When performance time neared, we had to EXIT the park, load up the buses, drive around to the employee entrance, get dressed, and then enter the park through a performance staging area.  When we were done performing, it was the same in reverse.  We were never allowed to be seen in our band uniforms apart from actually being a part of Disney's performance (actually performing).  All of the preparation takes place out of the public view, so that you never see a Disney character out of character per se; you never see a dwarf with the head portion of their costume off for example.  Everything is always perfect.  It's just amazing.

Another thing that amazed me was the music in the park.  You may have noticed that there is almost always music playing around you, and yet you can never find a spot where you hear two opposing music streams.  Somehow they have coordinated ALL of that to be seamless throughout the entire park.  Even during the parades, the music is seamless as it arrives and passes or as the various floats with different music pass through.  For the life of me I don't know how they do it!  Also, you just don't see speakers ANYWHERE.  The audio sources are hidden.  It's crazy.

The creative detail is perhaps what impresses me the most.  Near one of the bakeries at Disneyland in California, right off Main Street, up on the second floor, there is what looks like an apartment.  The sounds coming out of that "apartment", complete with window motion (shadows) is that Goofy is living up there - watching TV, showering, cooking etc.  You could pass through there and not even know it.

I also remember waiting for a performance of one of their theatrical shows.  A "maintenance guy" came out on the stage and really looked as if he was checking the lights, etc., for the show.  But then he starts talking with some people up front in the stands, and eventually he's singing and dancing, and a few other "maintenance guys" wander in and join him, and boom!  Without hardly realizing it, we were witnessing a planned pre-show performance to keep the crowd occupied.  Again, I was just amazed.  It felt like we were getting a special treat, when it was all creatively planned that way.

Lastly, (I can think of dozens of other examples) when we were at Disneyworld we spent a day at the "Blizzard Beach" Disney waterpark.  How do you make a WATERPARK look and feel like a ski resort???  I have no idea how you would even want to attempt that, but Disney absolutely nailed it.  It looks like a ski resort.  The buildings look like they have snow on them, there are icicles on the roof edges, the big water slide looks like a ski jump, there are ski lifts to ride to the top, chateaus, icebergs in the water, etc.  Absolutely blew my mind.  And then there is "Typhoon Lagoon" (the other Disney waterpark) that somehow makes it look like it just got wrecked by a typhoon and yet it's still charming!  

Seriously, their creative minds are through the roof.  I am so impressed with Disney that I almost don't mind forking over the $150 that it costs to spend a day there!  I'd like to see what they do to convey to every one of their thousands of employees that they have an integral part to play in creating the magic of Disney.  

Christian Men's Retreat Learning

This past weekend I attended my first Christian men's retreat ever.  This one was sponsored by our church, a church we've been attending fairly regularly since our move to Denver in mid-2013.  It's an awesome church, but a big one, and I had failed to connect with many in the congregation because of the size.  So the retreat represented a big opportunity to get to know others in the church better, and in doing so grow closer to God in my walk with him. 

So while I was contemplating whether to go or not, Holly encouraged me and signed me up.  Nothing like receiving that much needed nudge when you're on the fence!

Off I went, with anxieties and anticipations in tow ...

I'm really glad I went.  What were my takeaways from the retreat?

• We are all broken. I met other men in the church who are at various stages in their walk with God.  It was comforting knowing that I wasn't alone in my struggles to be a better husband, father, friend, colleague, neighbor and man of God.
  
• There is one specific quality and character trait that is a key attribute of living a God-centered life - HUMILITY.  It will protect our relationships, safeguard our career, and enable us to experience life to its fullest.  I learned that Jesus' teachings centered on humbleness more than any other character trait except one - love.  I also learned that being humble always outpaces us.  If you reach a point at which you are proud of your humbleness, then by definition you aren't being humble!
  
• Three lies and three truths:

• Lie #1: I am defined by my success.
• Truth #1: I am defined by God's love.

• Lie #2: I don't need close friends.
• Truth #2: God created me to live in community with others.

• Lie #3:  I don't have what it takes, AND I have what it takes.
• Truth #3:  God will provide what it takes.

The content of the conference was rich and I took a great deal from it beyond what is stated above.  It provided a great opportunity for reflection and spiritual growth.  Like many things, the learnings will be fleeting unless I incorporate a plan to make the learnings a daily part of my life.  So all participants were challenged to create a personal plan for living a more God-centered and less self-centered life.  

Although I read as much scripture over the weekend as I had read in a month, I'll only offer one here because it is a fitting summary to my weekend spent at the retreat.

"He must become greater, I must become less" - John 3:30

   

The "magic" of Disney

I am fresh of my first and perhaps only visit to Disney World. Overall a great experience and one that was enjoyed and will be remembered by our family. I have a few takeaways about Disney, and perhaps about our family as well. Here we go!!!

1. The Happiest Place on Earth?
It is cool, and a ton of fun, but I'm not sure about the happiest place on earth billing. Many people have shared their experiences (more on that later) which invariably include a zombie march through the throngs of people in the middle of the night to see the fireworks illuminate the Magic Kingdom. Shortly followed by screaming, overtired kids who have endured so much fun they can't see straight.

For us, that's not our happy place. And I thought that melt down only happened later into the day. What I learned is that every 10-15 minutes, within earshot there will be some kids losing her/his mind over something. A toy not purchased, a treat denied, a ride or experience delayed, or succumbing to the heat and humidity. It starts about 15 minutes after the park opens. It probably ends about 90 minutes after the park closes, although we did not stay late enough to see the closing ceremonies any night.

2. Everyone has advice on Disney.
I remember very clearly when we were pregnant with Sasha, everyone had some advice. If they had kids they shared their experience and wisdom, and if not they shared the wisdom from their childhood experience or that of their parents. But make no mistake, there is nothing that brings out the unsolicited advice from others like having a child. EXCEPT Disney!

In the 4-6 month build up to our trip, we would casually share our family vacation plans. And invariably we received immediate feedback on what to do/not do. I was surprised although in retrospect I should not have been. Disney is such a big experience that it is a lot like having a child (and nearly as expensive!), everyone has done it or known someone who has. They've got ideas to share and are more than eager to do so.

Now lest we think that this is an unwelcome sharing of advice, we actually benefited tremendously from all the feedback we received. Our trip would not have been as enjoyable as it was if we had not listened to all the ideas of others and used them to craft our Disney plan. Which brings me to...

3. Have a plan or suffer the consequences.
Integrating all of that advice with the independent research we (by we I mean Sheila) did was a hefty task. Then to use all that information to craft our plan of attack for making the trip what we wanted was a part time job. So many items need to be planned in advance, and we are talking months not weeks or days. Sheila was all over every detail as we all know she would be. More than anything from the trip, I am thankful that due to all of her effort we had the trip we wanted. To have not gone through all of that effort would have left us scrambling for each experience, each meal, each transportation, each [fill in blank here]. For some maybe that works, but as the B3aW readership know that's not really how we run our railroad.

4. They think of everything.
For the last couple years I have read the Disney Institute blog which focuses on how Disney tries to create the best customer experience possible. I consistently find tidbits that I can apply to our business at MediRevv. I look at that information in a whole new way now having a personal experience at Disney. They really do think of everything. From ride queues, transportation, transaction efficiency, it all is super dialed in. I was incredibly impressed by it all and it made the inevitable lines, crowds, and weather which can be daunting a bit more enjoyable to see how the Disney engine manages these issues to drive the right customer experience.

5. It's a trip, not a vacation.
This was perhaps the best advice I received about our visit to Orlando. A week at Disney isn't a vacation. It is simply to intense, by any reasonable standard, to be a vacation as defined by most. I didn't come back refreshed, not energized. Not quite exhausted, but close. But having that perspective going in made it much easier to enjoy.

6. The Disney pay before you go model.
Most businesses are go/get then pay. It makes sense. Why would I pay the plumber before he fixes my leaky sink? Why would I pay for my jeans before I get to wear them? Experiences are typically the exception where you pay for the football or concert tickets in advance of going. But that's a minor expense.

At Disney? Hotel - in advance. Park tickets - in advance. Experience meals like breakfast with the Princesses - prepaid. We've been paying for this trip for six months! When you turn that around and think about it from Disney's perspective, they in many ways get to cash flow their business by using the proceeds from future sales. Running that expensive of an operation (70k employees are expensive!) is a cash hungry machine to say the least, but I imagine that a greater percentage of operating costs are covered by prepaid revenue than most businesses. That's a pretty awesome financial model for them.