10 things from the Brothers weekend in Denver

1.  Hot dogs at sporting events are the best hot dogs in the world

2.  Broncos just want to get you off their backs; Bulls want to kill you

3.  There is no ice cream that is worth waiting for 45 minutes

4.  Irregardless of where you are on the gun control spectrum, you can show a driver’s license and be given a handgun with as much ammo as you want to buy

5.  Rock climbing, although fun, is a hell of a lot of work

6.  I miss having a dog

7.  Whether it’s dancing, cheer leading, or mutton-busting, watching little kids do it is fun

8.  I didn’t know they made 5-foot trophies

9.  I suck at racquetball

10.  Rodeos have DJs

Re: Learning from unemployment

I appreciate you sharing the blog about what you’ve learned from unemployment.  You are correct in that I’ve never been unemployed.  I started at Super Valu at the start of my junior year and worked until I left for the Navy.  The two years that I was out of the Navy I wasn’t really looking to work (thanks to having a wife that was willing to work) but a couple of jobs “fell into my lap” thanks to recommendations from friends.  I rejoined the Navy in 1995, and almost 20 years later, here I am, still “working for Uncle Sam” as Mom likes to say.

I think that you said at the beginning of the blog is true - all of those lessons can be learned apart from unemployment, but when you don’t have a job it’s kind of like doing the one-week intensive class instead of the semester course. 

As I read through your blog, in my minds eye, they all seemed to be linked together.  Humility, relationships, envy, appreciation, finances… it all tends to run together.  Humility is invaluable in relationships, envy can have a huge impact on how we spend, which is in turn affected by how much we appreciate things, and the things can affect our humility if we’re not careful.  

You mentioned one thing that struck a chord with me because it is something that I’ve noticed more in more in not only advertising, but in all facets of life: entitlement (or “deserving”).  Advertisers learned a long time ago that reasonable people may REASON that they don’t need something.  So they went to the tact of convincing people that they deserve it.  Who is going to pass up on something that they deserve??  Everybody wants what they deserve, right?  And as I said, it’s not just advertising.  You can pick any part of life in America: the job market, school, real estate, government…  everyone “deserves” something.  I’m not immune to it.  I’m a victim of that American mentality more often than I want to admit it.  Just recently I pretty much convinced myself that I deserve a new road bike because I’ve been riding the same one for 10+ years.  I might WANT a new one, but I need one (the one I’m riding still rides great) and I most certainly don’t DESERVE one.  It’s just so easy to take the entitlement super highway.  There are a whole lot of people in the United States living beyond their means because they’ve convinced themselves that they deserve a certain lifestyle.  

As far as relationships go, I’m sure that in unemployment you very quickly find out who your real friends are, or in other words, the relationships that are worth maintaining.  When you mentioned it, I couldn’t help but think that it’s important to nurture those relationships in the good times (like employment) so that they are willing to support during the tough times.  Relationships are investments, and you can’t expect a return on something you haven’t invested in.

Thank you for the reminder on appreciation.  I’ve been pretty discouraged due to our home search since arriving in Maryland (blog to follow later).  And when I think about all that you said, I have to evaluate and appreciate all that I DO have.  I’m not living on the streets, and our frustration with finding something is only because of our own demands based on our tastes.  It’s not like we can’t afford to live ANYWHERE and are living on the streets.  

Being thankful, envy, money, relationships, humility… these are the daily battles of mankind.  Sometimes I wonder whether I’m winning the battle most days or losing them.

March Madness

Well the mania has begun.  I love this time of year.  All the passive fans throughout the year come out and cheer for their respective favorites as 68 teams make a run for being NCAA tournament champion.

There have already been big upsets, among them Iowa State.  And there are sure to be cinderella's emerge as a result of these upsets.  But the giants are still lurking (Kentucky, Villanova, Duke, Wisconsin).

I would like to see my beloved Hawkeyes win a game ... or two!  Yes, I'm greedy.  But then again it's been a long time since the Hawkeyes have won more than one game in the NCAA tournament.  So maybe they are due.  And not many have faith in this team.  I want them to win and am hopeful they do so, but I'm not expecting them to win.  That's a big difference.

And how about Northern Iowa?  I'm happy and hope they do well also.  Would be great to see them take out a few giants along the way.

So because the Cyclones have already lost (frankly I have a tough time cheering for them) I will cheer for the rest of the Iowa teams.  First and foremost my beloved Hawkeyes ... GO HAWKS!  But also for UNI, go Panthers!

May the best team on that night win!

Brackets?  My family competes against each other every year by filling in a bracket.  Haley is on Spring Break so she's out this year.  Holly picked Iowa State as her national champion, Alex and Luke picked Villanova, and I picked Duke.  I told Holly it served her right considering she picked Iowa's rival to go all the way.  Gotta say I'm not sad about that.

Should be a fun set of games over the next week or so.

Who do you think wins it all?

FitBit, Do you have one?

Yeah, so when I began my new job one of the perks that they offered in benefits was a discount on the purchase of any version of the 'fitbit'.  I've seen lots on really unhealthy looking people wearing these things and so I was pretty pessimistic about the impact they might have on my health.  But since I could purchase the flex for only $29 (I've spent that on a bad gamble at an unknown restaurant) I went ahead an splurged for one.  It arrived quickly and I plugged it in and started using it.

Now, I must say that I literally plugged it in and started using it.  The only thing I did was set up my profile.  I didn't learn about all the bells and whistles, and didn't invest any time ready the manual.  After all, I'm of the male species.  But I will say it's relatively intuitive because most of the features I'm using - at least the ones I want to at this point.

So the thing recommended that my goal should be 10k steps per day.  Ok, whatever.  For those of you non-fitbit-users, that's about 5 miles of walking a day.  It didn't take me long to realize that my steps if I do nothing special on a work day ended up somewhere between 4k and 6k steps.

If I played racquetball in the evening (I try to do this three days per week) then that would provide an additional 5k - 7k steps.  But if I didn't I needed another way of collecting steps.

And yes, I have a dog, and yes that dog needs walking, so I started supplementing my steps for a day by walking Rocky in the evening.  Sometimes as much as an hour and a half!  But whatever it took to get to 10k that's what I did.

Good right?  I felt good about myself.

I also am tracking how much sleep I'm getting, and how "restful" that sleep is.  When I sleep I sleep hard, so that wasn't an issue.  But seeing how much sleep I get was a different story.  I'm averaging about 6 hours and 40 minutes of sleep a night.  Closer to 6 during the week, and between 7 and 8 on the weekends.  I feel pretty good about that also.

Now to the food and water plan.  I may decide to start tracking the amount of water I drink a day.  I think that would be a good reminder.  I'm confident I could drink the required amount each day.  The food plan, that would be different.  I'm worried that the alarms will be going off with the amount of calories I put into my pie hole each day.  But I'm going to take this step, just not sure when.

Any chance I can get my two brothers to get a Fitbit flex and join in on the fun?

Top Ten List from Brothers3areWe Get Together in February

Number 10: Our lives are growing apart, but we remain close.
Number 9:  Mutton busting is the best part of a rodeo
Number 8:  A 45 caliber pistol is a 'hand cannon'.
Number 7:  Even pro basketball players miss shots and lose games, the difference is they sulk while driving home in their pre-started Ferrari and not the back of their parent's car.
Number 6:  We are all getting old. We were in bed by 11:00pm every evening.
Number 5:  Rock climbing and shooting hand guns are both physically taxing, in ways I never imagined.
Number 4:  Auto belays are expensive.
Number 3:  Racquetball can be a great round-robin activity.
Number 2:  Iowans are everywhere, and no matter where you find them they are always really nice people.
Number 1:  I hope we all continue to commit to these get togethers, because I love both my brothers very much.

I would encourage Marc and Brad to come up with their Top Ten as well.

Don't Let Your Job Define You

I would like to re-create and continue this discussion on the blog, prompted by Marc sending along an article that was thought provoking to say the least.

Marc, would you please repost here, along with your comments (and Brad's and mine, or we can just recreate) because I think it is a valuable debate.

I wasn't personally offended by the differences we had, just intrigued and pretty extreme in my views on the subject.  Rather than try to recreate it without the benefit of the article, I'll wait for Marc to repost.

Ed

What I Learned from Being Unemployed

Brad prompted Marc and I about the blog (or lack thereof) so I've got a couple of topics at least that I would like to post.  So here goes ...

I've been meaning to share what I believe are the BENEFITS of being unemployed.  I've found myself unemployed way more than either of  my brothers combined (have either of you ever been unemployed?), and trust me, that's not bragging.  But it has taught me some valuable lessons, lessons that would be nice to be learned while employed but that 'come home to roost' more prolifically when unemployed so to speak.

And yes, I'll start by saying you can learn these lessons while employed but if you haven't been unemployed (at least in the semi to long term) then I'm not sure you can speak with much authority on the topic.  Yes, that means I believe my opinion on this subject is more reflective than my brothers or anyone else who hasn't really walked in the shoes of the unemployed.  That would go for Obama too ...

1. Humility - About the time you start to get cocky, egotistical, arrogant or all of the above, being unemployed will change that in a hurry.  It taught me that I'm not better than anyone else.  In fact, while you are unemployed it can create doubts about whether you are as good as others.  Humility is good in small doses and I'm not sure unemployment (at least extended unemployment) qualifies as a small dose.  But unemployment will keep you humble for sure.  The world revolves as it did when you were unemployed, the difference is you don't feel a part of it.  It's moving without you and that's humbling.

2. Perseverance - When you want something, anything badly enough you will persevere to achieve it.  But when you don't have a job and aren't earning money suddenly lots of things become things you want.  Therefore your perseverance to find a job, make the money and get those things (maybe a vacation with family, a new couch for the living room, or that new skateboard your kid wants and earned by achieving great grades) that you "deserve" increase substantially.  This represents the 'high' of being unemployed, when you're bullish and out in the market everyday meeting people, shaking hands and kissing babies.  The opposite 'low' occurs when you wake up late one morning and find that the world is well into it's day, and you have absolutely nothing to do - no one to see, nothing to accomplish, no jobs to interview for, nothing.  That's the low in the process.

3. Relationships are EVERYTHING - When you are deep within your normal life, off to job, home from work, pick up kids, doing family stuff on the weekend, it's easy to overlook the importance of those that are closest to you in your life.  Your spouse, kids, dog, and best friends.  But when you find yourself unemployed then those relationships become crucially important to keeping you on the high side of the highs and lows, and keeping you out of the low side of the highs and lows.  They are the ones that will talk to you and care about you and what you are doing when you don't have a job.  The other relationships you hold are just casual relationships that come and go.

4. Finances - You spend way too much on stupid stuff - When you're unemployed your finances are challenged.  You invest more time in what you spend money on, as a means of trimming back a bit and making what you have go farther.  It suddenly becomes really easy for you to see all the BS, the excess and the crazy shit you spend money on when you are employed.  Unfortunately, it's hard to not let that stuff creep back in when you become re-employed.  But you also realize the stuff that's really important, the best investments you can make regardless of how much you earn.  For me that is my kids.  Period.

5. Envy - You learn how wicked envy can be and how easily it can chew up any good you may see in others.  When I was unemployed I thought to myself "they have this or that, I don't have this or that, they don't deserve it as much as I do".  That's sad to say, but it's true.  It's a corollary to humility but if you don't keep yourself in check the world can get to be a pretty dark place.

6. Appreciation - When become re-employed (which fortunately for me I have been able to) you don't take for granted getting a paycheck every couple of weeks.  You don't take for granted how awesome "the grind" is of going to work, working hard, and earning a paycheck.  It's routine, it's important, and it creates purpose in your daily life.  I've been very lucky to rebound and find better opportunities every time I became unemployed for one reason or another.  And each time I feel more and more blessed in being able to do so.