Secrets to a Strong Marriage

How about the secrets of a good marriage?  The reason this has come to mind is because the Aunt and Uncle I’m staying with (actually on Holly’s side of the family) is celebrating their 51^st wedding anniversary today.  Wow, isn’t that awesome?!  Yes, it is. 

And what is a typical question asked of couples that seem to have figured out the formula for life long marriage?  Of course, what is the secret?!

I’ve had this question asked of me and here have been some of my “off the cuff” responses:

·       Better to be lucky than good

·       Holly and I didn’t really know what we were getting into, but we were clueless together and just figured it out along the way

·       Neither Holly or I viewed it as an option to get a divorce when we vowed “for better or worse, until death do part”

·       I can’t believe it myself … that I found a woman who has put up with me all those years

·       Holly and I are both passionate about our marriage, and while that has been caustic at times there is no ambivalence in our relationship.  I think that’s key

A slightly more thoughtful answer has been “every couple’s formula is different” and that couldn’t be truer than looking at the three brothers and our lovely wives who contribute to this blog. 

Marc, Brad and I have had discussions about this.  And yes, we joke with each other about how none of us could survive more than a few weeks in each other’s marriages.  I’m certain our wives feel the same!  None of us could imagine a “marriage swap”.  We’ve all carved out successful marriages based on very different terms.

So I’m not really sure how Holly and I have been able to remain happily married for nearly 24 years.  But I do know that I’m blessed, lucky and extremely thankful for having her as my soul mate.  I can’t imagine my life without her in it.