I've gone to gyms before, but since it's been a regular thing as a result of our fitness challenge, I've been observing a few things at the military gym...
- WARP SPEED, ZERO RESISTANCE. I've never been a huge fan of the elliptical machines, but have found them to be more comfortable than "pounding the pavement." It's not unusual for someone to be next to me who is cranking out about 400 strides per minute. I can't help but glance over and notice that the resistance is at zero and the elevation is at -2. I guess it still gets your heart rate up, but to me it's the equivalent of doing three sets of 250 reps with a broom stick on the bench press.
- WHAT WAS THAT BRO? Over on the free weight side, most people are working out with a friend. I find it comical when two dudes are continually trying to carry on a conversation when they are both wearing headphones. They do their entire workout pulling one earbud out to hear their friend, and then putting it back in to crank out those eight reps!
- BEATS BY DRE. I realize that "Beats by Dr. Dre" are just another fashion accessory, and so I shouldn't be surprised that it carries over into the gym. Whether it's on the treadmill, the stationary bike, the squat machine, or some free weight curls, those headphones are NOT the headphones that I would choose for the gym. The size makes them look a little silly.
- BEACH CRUISING. I'll pick on the women for a second. It seems that pairs of them like to come to the gym, sit on the recumbent stationary bikes, and read magazines and catch up on last year's news while giving the appearance of riding a bicycle. Unlike the crazy elliptical gazelles, these ladies are turning about 25 revolutions a minute on the bike, and I don't think they are set on level 20 for resistance!
- I'M NOT IN THE NAVY. Marines have a pretty typical look, and it's usually not hard to spot them anyway. But in a Navy gym, you won't have a problem identifying someone in the Marine Corps. They have USMC plastered on every piece of clothing they may be wearing. No respectable grunt wants someone thinking they might be a low-life Sailor! I have to give a close runner-up to the Chief Petty Officers for the "I want you to know this about me" category. CPOs don't work out in anything but a "You wish you were a Chief like me" shirt.
I'm not saying at all that any of these people don't belong in the gym. There are all types in the there and I'm sure there is another blogger out there on the interwebs who has comically pointed out that guy at the gym who spends about 15-25 minutes on a machine before he moves quickly on to a new one, as if he's doing a cardio-equipment triathlon. Besides, my 60 minutes in the gym would be a lot less entertaining if I couldn't do some people watching while I'm there.
One of my favorite quotes from Pride and Prejudice: "For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors, and laugh at them in our turn?"
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